Wednesday, March 11, 2015

That's the only way

It's a new season coming alive as I throw open the windows and shake loose the stale from having had the flu.  Fluffing clean sheets and creating a new space of fresh and clean.  Breathing deeply of spring air.  Suddenly gone a season of snow and cold. And being unwell beneath the covers.
Padding around today in my socks and slippers subsisting on warm applesauce; the landscape beginning to change.
And I welcome it.  I love the seasons.  I love change.  
Or at least I think I do.
Until change morphs into something ugly or scary.  And I want to run away.  Or hide.
Because it has been a paradigm shift for me this year.  Dealing with change.  And to be honest.  I want normal back.  Some days.
To run again.  And go to the gym.  And be with old friends.  Surrounded by people who know me well.  And life full of the familiar.
But here I am in the uncomfortable.  Of not knowing.  And having to decide.  Moving forward into new things.  A change in perception even.
But this I am learning.  Change never stops.  And sometimes it's just not as pretty as the seasons.  We have to battle.  But I am learning to fight better. 
So this morning I was delighted to preview Shauna's new book.  It's release day for Savor; her fourth.  In one line that quickly grabbed my attention, she wrote of herself and others "plunging ahead full of fear and vulnerability". 
How it resonated in my life.  We are not alone in our struggles. 
And fear does not preclude our doing things.  
Shauna has just returned from a trip to Israel and will have many good stories to share on her blog.  Looking forward to it.  But we all have a story. 
And mine is that of an empty nester loving photography and all things written and my man and our children.  Coming home to a house full of cozy warm where I can cocoon with the flu and, on other days, throw open my doors and welcome joyfully around our table.
But that is not all.  Struggles too.
And through my life and a blog.  Sharing them.  To encourage. 
And so I push publish even when I cringe. 
And I am recently choosing a new adventure.
Because when the paradigm shifts we can choose to embrace it.
Plunging ahead in the fear and the vulnerability.
And really.  That's the only way to live life.
Don't you think.

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